I recently heard a small group talking about a certain individual’s personality, and it turned into an overgeneralized, spectacularly judgemental, ego-feeding binge on the souls of ‘quiet people’.
This person was criticized for not being talkative and not being involved in a very verbal or socially responsive way. The observation that she doesn’t often make eye contact turned into the imagination that she must have no self-esteem or friends because she walks slumped forward, and reasoning that only confident people have friends. The observation that she’s a physicist led to comments about how she must have destroyed her social life by studying too much and how she probably never has fun.
Dear ‘loud’ people. Quiet people do have fun. They probably have fun maintaining a considerable distance from YOU. If being ‘quiet’ means not being socially equipped to connect with people, doesn’t that make YOU ‘quiet’ when you FAIL to engage a ‘quiet’ person? Maybe you’re not worth their social energy. But in a way that’s ok too. No one connects with everyone.
Being extroverted is not some pinnacle of personality success, nor is introversion the epitome of dysfunction. < < An especially good comment on a related blog post.
As a quiet person myself, I applaud (quietly) this post. Introverted people may not have a lot going on outwardly, but there’s a good chance that there’s a very rich inner dialogue going on. Many of the quiet folk I know have an excellent sense of self and are steadfast characters in all sorts of weather. The loud folk I have known might have dominant personalities in a group, but are often afraid to be alone, unable to listen to their inner voices. The world needs all kinds of people, loud and soft alike. Why can’t we all just get along??
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